Wilde recommends starting however you normally would sexually, and then move up one finger at the time until she can comfortably accommodate four of your fingers. But what do you do instead? You can also give your partner a vibrator to use on themselves to distract them from what could be a painful removal scenario, transforming it into what fisting should be overall, which is super fun and awesome. This allows your hand to be tapered, which is easier for slowly inserting to your partner. Shakti also recommends having a safe word since fisting can be so intense. Even if you wash your hands thoroughly, you want to make sure there are no abrasions from the nails or hangnails, explains Queen. She recommends just remaining still and then massaging the outside of her vagina with your other hand to relax the muscles while you slowly and carefully work the other hand out.
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